Living with intention, Mothering

I’m Here. 

image.jpgI’ve been showing up to yoga classes, whether I want to get out of bed or not. I have a toddler who will not sleep through the night. He was for a while. But now he’s not.

Yesterday, when I arrived at class (after feeding two kids, dressing one, then dropping the other off at school) there was one “good”‘spot left in the studio. There was a yoga block there and I didn’t know this was intended to save a spot for someone.

I began to unfurl my mat, and the woman beside me said, “Oh, this space is taken.” Before thinking, without any filter, I replied, “I’m here.”

“But she comes all the time.”

I didnt know what to say. My teacher, ever the mind reader and peacemaker, called me and said “Look, I can make room next to me!”

I sat on my mat and set my intentions on learning to listen and respond thoughtfully. It occurred to me that saving a spot at a yoga class is very anti yoga. But so is my overreacting and playing the exchange over and over in my head.

I have two children. They take up space in my life. They do things like get sick, bite my yoga blocks, take too long to get dressed, forget their backpack… There are ways in which it is so hard to show up. But I’m here.

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